Not my will, but your's be done.

Monday, August 25, 2008


Today was a big day for the Carlin family. We finalized Luke's adoption today. Josh and I started dating when Luke was very young. Luke has never known any other father but Josh. Explaining the adoption to Luke was difficult. From the time I was pregnant with him I completely intended to be honest with him and answer any questions he may have. I used my pregnancies with Ray and Trey to try to explain things to him. It just hasn't clicked with him yet. I have come to realize that I do not understand whatsoever how a five year olds mind works. The climax of my realization came last night when Luke asked me, " Is ya'll adopting me the same as when we got Pilot." (Pilot is Luke's dog.)

I think that Luke aquated getting Pilot with being adopted is because there has been a good deal of talk in our house lately about adopting a retired racing greyhound. I guess that has been the extent of his exposure to what adoption means. We discussed it further, but he still doesn't completely comprehend it all. He has no memory of Josh not being his dad, so he has a hard time grasping that there was a time in his life that Josh wasn't in his life. I know that it will be years before he understands, but at least there is an inkling of understanding.

This is us being sworn in. (I think Ray was trying to swear in her blankie also.)
My completely adorable baby boy.

The judge reviewed all of our documents and the case study, and then asked us some questions. They were general questions like how we felt about the adoption and so forth.
It was at this point that Judge Shelton asked Luke if he had talked to Pilot to see what he thought about the adoption. Luke said no. Then the judge asked Luke something about Josh. I can't remember what he asked but Luke mumbled an answer, but I could see his wheels turning. If you don't know my son, then I will enlighten you. He is a GREAT kid, and I'm serious about that. But he can talk anybody under the table. He talks pretty much from the time he wakes up, until the time the he is asleep. Once you ask him one question you open pandora's box. He will begin talking non-stop. So once I noticed that his wheels were turning I knew that his mouth would start soon after.

I was right. Soon after Luke blurted out, (while unintentionally pointing his thumb at Josh), "I've been trying to get him to quit eating dead chickens."

I froze.

As a mother I knew that he was talking about Pilot, as opposed to Josh,(although his flailing thumb was pointing at Josh), but I wasn't so sure that the judge would know who he was talking about. I'm sure that my eyes were as big as saucers. I was imagining the judge picture Josh biting the heads off of live chickens like some crazed Alice Cooper wanna-be.

Judge Shelton just smiled and said, "That's a hard habit to break, isn't it?"

Luke just nodded. Whew!
Everyone began snickering,(including the baliff), so I knew that whether or not the judge knew who Luke was referring to, it obviously didn't phase him.
Granny(my mom)and Granna(Josh's mom) participating in the big day.

Afterwards, we went to eat at IHOP(Luke's choice) to celebrate. This is my I'm-so-happy-this-is-finally-done face. It somewhat resembles my football game face, and my I'm-bored-and-playing-with-the-camera face.

Later that afternoon I met up with my great friend, Naomi. Naomi and I were roommates for about a year in college. She has an adorable daughter, Evie, that is about a week older than Ray. Naomi lives about 3 1/2 hours away, but was in town with her husband on business. It was great to get to see her, even if it was just for a couple of hours, and the girls had a blast playing together. Aren't they just adorable?

It was a tiring day, but wonderful, day. Ray decided that she would rest with Daddy awhile.

It was an important day for our family. And I will admit that I breathed a sigh of relief when all the legalities were taken care of for good.
In the words of Luke when he was asked about what today meant, he said, "I'm Daddy's son now. He chose me and I chose him too."


Matthew said...

wow, you guys, how amazing! congratulations to you all. i know this is such a weight off of your shoulders and luke and josh both deserve this wonderful day. blessings to the entire family...

sweet jenn said...

wow what an incredible day!! congratulations!!

The Kyler said...

That's amazing for you guys, I know that is a huge weight lifted!!! The chicken story was great, lol!!! Marcus and I are also thinking about adopting a retired greyhound. Congrats on your great day!!!

Sara said...

Congrats on such wonderful news! I know that brings such relief and happiness!
I hope you had a great day!

Melanie said...

Oh how exciting! I just love Luke. I'm really going to miss him in Cubbies. I'll tell you my funny Luke story. He was probably 3 and we had the Cubbies playing in the room and I asked him if I could tie his shoe. He said, in his full Luke southern accent "Well you can tie my shoe any ole' time you want to!" Oh my, it was just too cute. He is such a sweetheart. I love him saying his daddy chose him, and he chose his daddy too. :)

Heather said...

AWE!!! How sweet!!! I'm so happy for you that it is all said and DONE! :) The last statement has me tearing up!!!
Congratulations, Carlin Family!!!

MamaJ said...

YEAH!!!!! We have been praying for that!! We love you guys!! Congrats Luke!

Baby Copty said...

Hey Jessica. You don't know me. This is Joni I am a friend of Meagan's. I love your blog. You are such a strong woman who knows her God is even stronger. I love the last line of this post. It was spoken so beautifully. Out of the mouth of babes...

Jamie said...

You do not know me...I am a friend of Sara's. I am so happy for your family. I know how you feel, I am in the same boat. Just waiting for our court date in Sept. I am ready for it to be has almost been a year with lots of suprizes along the way. I can not wait for it to be done!

The night I found out that the adoption was being taking a turn, God came to me through my 5 year old. She said "Mommy do you want to hear my bible verse we learned at school today, I lift up my eyes to the hills and where does my help come from? my help comes from the LORD the maker of heavens and earth Psalms 121 1-2. Then later the song from casting crawing came on.

I love how Luke explained what the day meant. That is so true. It takes a wonderful man to chose to be a daddy.