Not my will, but your's be done.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Across the Universe

*The is my second attempt at this post. I posted a couple of days ago, but I decided I didn't like it so I deleted it.

After being scolded for doing so I am attempting to re-write it. The re-writes are never as good as the originals though.

As I'm sure you have noticed I have made some changes to my blog: background, pictures, music, the works! I knew that the majority of you would wonder where the quotes around the pictures came from and their signifigance. All of the quotes around the pictures are from Beatles songs. I am somewhat of a Beatles fanatic. I grew up listening to their music, so at an early age I fell in love with their timeless music and quirky personalities. I have a Beatles song that I have chosen to represent Josh, and each of my children.

I started this when Luke was a baby. He was the complete love of my life and I wanted to pick out a song to be "our song". I have a voice that only my mother and the Lord could ever possibly tolerate. But when Luke was a tiny infant I would sing to him as I rocked and nursed him. I sang alot of praise music and 3 or 4 of my favorite hymns, but I also wanted to have a different song that whenever he heard it he would think of my love for him. The warm fuzzies, if you will.

The months preceeding and following Luke's birth were engulfed in turmoil,(through no fault of his. He was practically a PERFECT baby). His song is "Here Comes the Sun". It is kinda a play on words, sun/son. But the main reason I chose it was because it talks about how things may have been difficult, but things are going to be okay.

Next came Josh. His song is "Here, There, and Everywhere". I knew that I wanted a Beatles song in my wedding. This song, although not previously in my top favorites, fit perfectly. It simply states that I need you everywhere for my life to be all that it can be. That is how I feel about Josh. I need him everywhere. Also, My Love is what I have called Josh since about a month after we met. So the fact that it says, "my love" in the lyrics made it even that more perfect.

Raylen's song just clicked. I was able to feel Raylen move what I feel like was pretty early in my pregnancy, at about 14 weeks. I had been feeling her move in my tummy for about a month before we found out that we were having a girl. I just KNEW she was going to be a boy(so much for that mother's intuition, right?), and I hadn't put any though whatsoever in to what her song was going to be. But the day we found out that we were having a girl, the song "Something"(also called "Something In the Way She Moves") got stuck in my head. I couldn't quit thinking about it and singing it(the singing was done in private). After that, every time I thought about that song, it reminded me of Ray. So it just automatically became her song. I didn't really have a choice in the matter. Even if I had mentally picked a different one, the song that will forever remind me of her and make me smile is "Something".

So Ray was born and more rocking/nursing/singing commenced.

Treyson's song is "Golden Slumbers". Before we knew about Treyson's complications I had a song picked out for it he was a boy, and another one for if he were a girl.

Then disaster struck.

Once we learned of Treyson's complications I knew that he needed a special song. We knew that we would probable never hear him cry, because of his lungs being underdeveloped. "Golden Slumbers" was the perfect song. Simple and Beautiful. It was the perfect lullabye for my baby.

I know that I'm a little nutty(Okay, maybe more than a little), but the songs are special to me. I wanted to share that with you.

Oh, also, here is a brief explanation of the songs that play on my blog. The first on is "Bring the Rain", by Mercy Me. Thoughout this difficult time in our life, Josh and I have tried to keep this song as our testimony. It was also played at Treyson's funeral.

The second song is "Held", by Natalie Grant. This song was sung so very beautifully at the funeral. Kelli even personalized the words for Treyson. It could not have been more perfect.

The third song is "Golden Slumbers".

The video below is of the song "Something". The song is special to me, but the reason I love the video is because of that love-in-your-eyes look they all have. I'm a sucker for that. You may not care to watch it. But if you do you need to scroll down to the bottom of the page and pause the music before you do.

One last thing. "Across the Universe" is also Beatles song. The lyrics aren't particularly meaningful(infact they sound somewhat drug induced), but the song is pretty and was part of the prelude music of our wedding. Also, it wasn't until several months after I picked "Something" to be Ray's song that I realized that it was in to prelude music of our wedding.


MamaJ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MamaJ said...

The "Golden Slumbers" song had me tearing up! We went to the beach today, thought about you guys! Love ya!

Heather said...

This is awesome!!! So very special! I love it!

Oh...and I really love all the new pictures and quotes!

Reese-E said...

love the new pictures and quotes and music and everything! it's looking good! :)

sweet jenn said...

this is a great post. I love that you picked songs for each of the important people in your life. what an incredible thing for your children to look back on and say "that was mine and mommy's song" precious.

Kelsie said...

it's nice to be able to put faces with the names! i have been reading your blog for quite a while-don't know why i haven't said anything until now. i think i just never knew what to say. i never thought i could truly put into words the pain i was feeling for you & your family. i couldn't imagine. it seems like you are getting stronger by the day though. i had a rough pregnancy (or at least i thought), but nothing can compare to what you have been through. anyway...just thought i would let myself be known :) i love the songs you picked for your family. they seem to fit perfectly, even though i don't know any of you (other than by the blog).

god bless,